Yunior's Family
So far, we’ve met Yunior’s family in three of the five stories in Drown (“Ysrael,” “Fiesta, 1980,” and “Aguantando”). I think the dynamics within this family are interesting to think about. For one, we get to see the relationship between Rafa and Yunior change as they get older. Another example is that the four of them seem to have a lot of family loyalty, despite the fact that they are not very close.
In the first story, “Ysrael,” Yunior and Rafa have a very strong relationship, even if this only exists when they are in the campo. Yunior looks up to his brother and wants his approval. He is also very excited that he and Rafa are going on this adventure together, without anybody else. Back in the city, they wouldn’t get an opportunity to bond like this, as Rafa would be too busy with his friends. In “Fiesta, 1980,” when the family is in New Jersey, we see that Rafa and Yunior aren’t very close anymore. They do seem to share some thoughts about their father’s affair, but they don’t discuss this topic, or any other, very much. When they are at the party, Rafa doesn’t interact with Yunior, and instead prefers to hang out with the other kids there. As a result, the two brothers become two different individuals, instead of acting as a team.'
Additionally, I was surprised by the fact that family always comes first for Yunior, Rafa, and Mami. Papi is the head of the house and makes all the decisions for the family (such as going to the party when no one wants to). He is also very strict and punishes Yunior severely for eating right before their car trip. But, no one discusses this ever, especially outside of the family.
For example, Rafa definitely idealizes his father. In “Ysrael,” Rafa tells Yunior to stop crying, saying “You have to get tougher. Crying all the time. Do you think our papi’s crying?” This shows that Rafa thinks of his father as a strong, tough man who can get through anything. He thinks that both he and Yunior need to be more like their papi, even though they can barely remember what he’s like. Also, he’s very protective of his father in front of other people. When Yunior begins to complain about Papi not letting him eat, Rafa tells him to stop and says that Papi’s reasons are valid. In “Aguantando,” when Yunior shares with Wilfredo that he received a letter from his father, Rafa scolds Yunior. He tells Yunior that “This is a family affair, Yunior. Don’t blab it all over the place.” Rafa doesn’t want everyone to know about what’s going on in their private lives.
This isn’t just the case with Rafa, though. Yunior also seems to want to protect and have a better relationship with his father. Even though Papi always picks on Yunior, Yunior still wants to go on car rides with him. These car rides didn’t really do anything to help Yunior, but he still looked forward to every single one. Yunior says that “when we were alone he treated me much better, like I was his son or something.” I think this is similar to the Papi’s imagined return at the end of “Aguantando.” Yunior hasn’t had a father figure for most of his life, and now he really wishes he had a kind and loving father. That’s why Yunior tries to have a good time with Papi when he can. I think for this same reason, he doesn’t tell his tia what is going on at home. He keeps his mouth shut because he is hoping that he might be able to have a good relationship with Papi eventually.
In the first story, “Ysrael,” Yunior and Rafa have a very strong relationship, even if this only exists when they are in the campo. Yunior looks up to his brother and wants his approval. He is also very excited that he and Rafa are going on this adventure together, without anybody else. Back in the city, they wouldn’t get an opportunity to bond like this, as Rafa would be too busy with his friends. In “Fiesta, 1980,” when the family is in New Jersey, we see that Rafa and Yunior aren’t very close anymore. They do seem to share some thoughts about their father’s affair, but they don’t discuss this topic, or any other, very much. When they are at the party, Rafa doesn’t interact with Yunior, and instead prefers to hang out with the other kids there. As a result, the two brothers become two different individuals, instead of acting as a team.'
Additionally, I was surprised by the fact that family always comes first for Yunior, Rafa, and Mami. Papi is the head of the house and makes all the decisions for the family (such as going to the party when no one wants to). He is also very strict and punishes Yunior severely for eating right before their car trip. But, no one discusses this ever, especially outside of the family.
For example, Rafa definitely idealizes his father. In “Ysrael,” Rafa tells Yunior to stop crying, saying “You have to get tougher. Crying all the time. Do you think our papi’s crying?” This shows that Rafa thinks of his father as a strong, tough man who can get through anything. He thinks that both he and Yunior need to be more like their papi, even though they can barely remember what he’s like. Also, he’s very protective of his father in front of other people. When Yunior begins to complain about Papi not letting him eat, Rafa tells him to stop and says that Papi’s reasons are valid. In “Aguantando,” when Yunior shares with Wilfredo that he received a letter from his father, Rafa scolds Yunior. He tells Yunior that “This is a family affair, Yunior. Don’t blab it all over the place.” Rafa doesn’t want everyone to know about what’s going on in their private lives.
This isn’t just the case with Rafa, though. Yunior also seems to want to protect and have a better relationship with his father. Even though Papi always picks on Yunior, Yunior still wants to go on car rides with him. These car rides didn’t really do anything to help Yunior, but he still looked forward to every single one. Yunior says that “when we were alone he treated me much better, like I was his son or something.” I think this is similar to the Papi’s imagined return at the end of “Aguantando.” Yunior hasn’t had a father figure for most of his life, and now he really wishes he had a kind and loving father. That’s why Yunior tries to have a good time with Papi when he can. I think for this same reason, he doesn’t tell his tia what is going on at home. He keeps his mouth shut because he is hoping that he might be able to have a good relationship with Papi eventually.
I do think it's interesting to see how Rafa and Yunior's relationship changes. I think a large part has to do with the presence of Rafa's friends like you mention. When Rafa's friends aren't around at the campo, Rafa and Yunior get along great unlike when his friends are present outside of the campo. The presence of their father may play another role. When their father isn't around, Rafa acts more like a father figure to Yunior, and their relationship seems to be great. However, when they're in the States and their father is present, Rafa seems to take a step down from that position which seems to alter the brothers' relationship, but that's just an idea. Great post!
ReplyDeleteI didn’t think about how loyal Rafa was to Papi until this post, but you’re right, a lot of his actions do show this admiration for the father. What I see from Yunior is a little different. I think he just wants a father, and Papi is the only person he has to fit that role, so he enjoys the car rides because that’s when Papi treats him as his son. I read Yunior not telling anyone about Papi’s affair as more of not wanting to hurt Mami than anything else, though perhaps it could also be loyalty. I find it ironic and a little sickening honestly how loyal this family is to a man that left them for 6 years and has an ongoing affair.
ReplyDeleteJust to play devil's advocate I think it's worth pointing out that Yunior's actions to defend his Papi could also be out of fear and that his willingness to go on the car rides with him was for this sense of being someone's son. In other words, it's possible Yunior was less driven by Papi himself and more driven by the prospect of having a father who treated him right. I found the progression of Yunior's relationship with his father particularly interesting. In "Ysreal" he knows very close to nothing about his father and just sees him as the image of a typical masculine man. In "Aguantando", Yunior gets glimpses into who his father is through the ways in which his mother and brother talk about him and the disappointment when Papi does not come as he promised. By "Fiesta, 1980", Yunior no longer has the element of unknowing in his relationship with Papi so rather than having to make up what he is like, he knows the reality.
ReplyDeleteI do think it's interesting how both of the boys look at Papi, particularly Yunior. His Papi doesn't treat him well at all and he still wants that relationship with him. He wants to have some kind of father and so I think that he latches on to any hope of becoming close to his father even if that means holding himself back.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the family dynamics in the stories involving this family are interesting. We can see that some of the relationships are especially toxic (Yunior and Papi), but others, like you say, are still somewhat based on hiding Papi's toxicity? I thought this was especially interesting, and made me sad given the old dynamics of the family. Good post!
ReplyDeleteRaffa starts scolding Yunior before papa even shows up in Aguantando. Are some people just more inclined towards this masculinity? Where else would Raffa have learned this from? Solid post. You connect the family relationships well, showing how Raffa looks up to the father.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't exactly decipher whether Rafa was also just being prudent with wanting to keep the family's affairs private (who knows how Papi would react if outside family members showed concern?), but it wouldn't surprise me if Rafa did have some weird sense of loyalty to his father. He seemed to have a lot of stock in Papi even when Papi wasn't in their lives, after all. I guess I'd be even more disillusioned in my father seeing how he acted after I idolized him in his absence, but who knows.
ReplyDeleteI think there is definitely something to say about the significance of family to Yunior, Rafa, and their father. While I didn't take their relationship to be as strong as you suggest, you bring up some good points. One thing I thought about (and discussed a little in my own blog) was the role of the mom in all of this. The importance of family seems to become distant or at least Diaz doesn't seem to cover that much about their relationships with their mother. It could be that the father brings the most character to the discussion and that is why his role is emphasized, but it was just something I noticed.
ReplyDeleteit seems to me that Rafa internalized the behavior that he learned from his father. Despite the fact that his father had not yet arrived in Aguantando, the brief interactions and eventual rough discipline ingrained themselves very quickly. I really enjoyed your analysis of the family dynamic between Rafa, Yunior and their father that a strength holds the family together despite the constant abuse exercised by their father. Great Post!
ReplyDeleteI think that part of the growing gap between Rafa and Yunior is the father's harsh treatment that is focused on Yunior. Yunior mentions that Rafa knows when their father is angry and he needs to move away from Yunior or risk being a target of this anger himself. A lot of Rafa's comments, especially about keeping family matters private, is more about not angering their father than they are about any personal interest in keeping these matters private. I think that as Yunior and their father get into more and more conflicts Rafa begins to draw away from Yunior simply because he wants to avoid getting in trouble himself. I think that the presence of his friends exacerbates this because he doesn't want to be embarrassed in from of them and he has other people who he also enjoys spending time with, whereas in the campo he only has Yunior.
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